Tips To Help You Move On From The Past

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“In life every ending is just a new beginning”, says a character in Dakota Fanning’s Uptown Girls. I wish we can say the same for Chidera. Every blow life dealt her left a deep wound. Though wounds heal with time, she always relieved the gory moments which have a way of deepening the injury. There’s no way for her to get over her past. Because of this she kept finding herself in the wrong hands until she said no to any form of relationship.

The latest?

If her damaged womb could tell this tale, it would. Because she seemed to have lost her voice since the doctor prodded her insides with those ‘things’. It was dark so she couldn’t see his tools. She could only recall the excruciating pain and her screams that faithful night.

It’s not like she didn’t see the signals but she plunged herself headlong into the relationship…at least that’s what she thought it was. He had a smooth tongue and didn’t even need to say too much before she accepted. Why won’t she? She wanted so desperately to be someone’s woman.  She saw how people flaunted their relationships on their status updates, the gifts, the proposals, even the ones who have been in lasting relationships… Well, what did she know? She just wanted to belong.

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It didn’t last long, but the efforts she put into it made it seem so. She even let go of most of her lady values, went commando to his house many times just because he wanted her to. This was the result, he’s gone like a candle in the wind. And she’s here one scar added to her catalogue.

But that was twenty years ago…

Why did it seem like it was just yesterday? She had pushed every interested Tom, Dick and Harry off of her with her cold exterior. The last one was the end, she had made sure of that.

What she didn’t know was that it was only the beginning of a life of bitterness, regrets and solitude for her. She didn’t think she’d ever get over the past so she dwelt in it every second of every day. That was her mistake. Now she’s fifty years old, aged beyond her years. A wealthy old lady in a cold mansion whose only future is a lone grave without flowers.

But it’s not too late. Who’ll tell her that there’s still a chance for the flower seed to germinate even when if it’s looking dead? Who’ll tell her that there’s still a lot of beginnings with endings? Who’ll teach her that the way she sees a situation is how it’ll be for her? Who’ll tell her that life still holds great things for her?

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No one but herself!!!

Yes! It has to come from within, she has to tell herself that the past it over. History will only repeat itself if she lets it. So she needs to be aware that no one can take her memories from her. Each day is a new beginning, she needs to make good memories every day.

Are you like Chidera?

It’s time to turn the pages of that chapter. The beginning of change is when you take that step. It’s not over. Has life been unfair? Learn to see something good in every situation, fortunate or not. There’s a lesson to be learnt in every circumstance; look out for it and take it with you to your new phase. Stop dwelling in your past! It holds nothing but regrets. Keep on moving!

Never forget that when something ends, a new thing begins and a new beginning is always a new chance at life.. Learning to see the end of something as an opportunity rather than a bad thing would help to change the way you see life the moment when you begin that new chapter in your life.


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3 Comments

  1. To live in the bitter past is to rob today of its Joy..bt getting over the Past can it be an easy journey? i wish someday to be able to understand the tricks of the mind..

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